11/18/18

Faux Suede Jacket and Floral Print Dress

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Hi friends,

With November standing on its last leg, we are approaching the "barely seen any daylight" time of the year, as we rush off to our lives early in the dark mornings and come home late in the afternoon. But not to worry, we are guided by the Christmas lights, which are slowly starting to be lit in the cities we live in, to lead the way for us through the dark and cold of the next few weeks to come. 

I am, however already in a new year set of mind, as always living a few months ahead, recently I have been thinking of the year gone by, of the major and minor changes in my life and how weirdly, at the same time it has been one of the best and equally hardest years of my life.



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Dress - ASOS, Boots - H&M, Jacket - Blush Noir

However, its not yet the time for the reflecting on the year past blog post, so I will touch on why I am in this state of mind instead rather than the year itself. Changing environments make us act different. I don't know about the rest of you, but to me new environments and people completely take me out my comfort zone, and often make me question myself. It might be that all of you reading enjoy the beginnings, unknown, figuring people out, starting new chapters. And, if that is the case, I take my hat off to you and please, pretty please - teach me your ways. 

If, however, like me, new environments, whether that be a new school, new job, new group of people, make you shiver and then afterwards question anything and everything you said for the next few days to come, then -  "Hello and welcome to my life!"

This year has been filled with new chapters, around every corner change was thrown my way, like it almost had gathered up from previous years to explode at me all at once. And somehow, I have the weird, unsettling feeling that it's not yet over. So, being in these new environments, to me means I can't relax, I can't be comfortable, I can't always act like myself, which in its entirety annoys me. Nevertheless, I know this is to do with trust, with evaluation, with acceptance. I have lowered my guard too quick before and gotten burned by the people around me, so my safety mechanism is stopping me, making sure I am protecting who I really am. Sadly, during times like this, we are less forgiving to ourselves for making mistakes, for doing something our "comfortable self" would never do. And then imagine how critical one must be, if their comfortable self already is a pain in the-a*s perfectionist. So, what I like to do then, and hopefully this is helpful to you guys, is firstly remember my importance and lower myself. On these occasions it actually helps realising that you are not the queen of the world, and that a - people don't come home thinking about you, micro-analysing your behaviour and b - those who do care and think of you will love and appreciate you anyway, especially for those quirks you have.

Secondly, I like to remember stories of other people in my life who I respect, who either have done well in their careers, or are just remarkable people in the way they live, as each and one of them will have a story where they either trip over in front of their boss, spill a drink allover themselves while talking to their crush, or say something utterly brainless. And, laugh, to myself and to them. Understanding that we all are just human, and the fact that they make these mistakes, make them more human, and make me respect and like them even more. We all make mistakes, s**t happens - move on!

So, my lovelies, I hope that you can appreciate the little weird bits of yourself and those around, and do not get too critical on yourself, but learn to grow from the little missteps in your way!

Always yours,
Agita

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