4/14/18

Red Linen Blazer and Black Jeans with Lacing


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Hi guys,

I don't know about you, but I certainly feel like these past 2 weeks have not been the easiest. Whether it's the Mercury Retrograde to blame or seemingly never ending grey here in the UK, everything feels like more of a struggle and things that usually would be easy and take a short time to complete, have taken me ages. During this time I have been thinking a lot about confidence and how a tiny shift in your regular routine can often turn your mindset upside down. A friend of mine said to me something that stuck and I have mulled it over in my brain during those days where nothing ever seems to be going my way. She said - "You can't always be perfect, but you can, however, always try to do your best."

It's such a simple thought, but for those of us who are never fully happy and are perfectionists to the point of emotional and physical exhaust, it is necessary to sometimes hear this. I have to say, I have always viewed confidence as a fake feeling. I have heard people often question how I can be so confident in certain situations in my life, to which I can only answer with - I'm not.

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 Jacket - H&M, Jeans - H&M, Boots - H&M - alternative, top - H&M, Bag - New Look

I often think of confidence as a muscle, the more you train it and use it, the stronger it will become. So, when it comes to confidence, my main advice is - fake it till you make it. In situations when you are unsure of yourself and know for a fact you might not have everything down to the tee, you must remember that others are unaware of this, and the only way they will become aware is when you display it. The great Anna Wintour once said this(click) and I don't think anything more accurate has ever been said about confidence and appearing to be confident. 

A lot to do with confidence is also how comfortable we feel. Sure, it will be harder to pretend you have it all together in a situation that is unfamiliar to you. And this is where the part about training confidence like a muscle comes in. If I am ever in that situation, I think of a person who I have previously admired, who I have seen excelling in this type of a scenario and what particularly made me impressed about their behaviour. I then try to apply it, even if it feels unnatural to me and 9 times out of 10 it will get the job done.  

And that's where the second and possibly the most important part about confidence comes in - surrounding yourself with driven, smart, kind, ambitious and loyal people. I have come to learn that in life others, in order to make themselves feel better (or more confident), will try to bring you down, and whether consciously or not, they will make you feel small. It is easy to spot this type of behaviour when those who are not close to us do it, because we can just label them as "haters" and move on (after a rant or few). However, it is harder to notice this when someone close to us or someone who we respect, a superior - does it, because we are meant to value their opinion. There is a very strong word for people like that and certainly for a reason. I'll give you a hint, another great legend (yes, she is a queen) under the name of Britney Spears has a song titled after that word ✈️. My only advice to this is - distancing yourself from people who make you feel like that and relaying on those who truly are there for us, people who will build you up and not drag you down. 

So, to end - I hope you lovely people can take something from this. I truly hope you are surrounded by strong and smart people who inspire you, and if not, know that you are pretty amazing and that you are growing no matter what you are going through as long as you don't stop! :)

Always yours,
Agita


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